A Good Man is Hard to Find

To find a good man, especially in today’s society, is a rare phenomenon, this is the assertion that you need recurrently in different places in your matter of course. Did you ponder over this statement, and why it is hard to find? Maybe, you are thinking that because of having a self-centered approach. It is fine, see, firstly, this is a subject question though there are certain universal truths, such as don’t speak a lie, be honest, and respect others, through which gauge any person to come at ultimatum whether he is good or not. However, to measure any person in this regard with the same parameters or standards is not possible, because of relative culture. Secondly, we are synonymous with the fact that, if we explore and unfold world history, whatever the phase of the industrial revolution was it prompted the concept of materialism and simultaneously individualism, which both predominately supplemented to self- centered approach without concerning to lives of others.

Thirdly, is it wrong to be selfish? Can a human be loyal to others throughout his or her life? These are pivotal questions to whom I would like to respond in my subjectivity before going to dive into the depth of the subject matter. Let us to the answer, to be selfish is not wrong, in my opinion, until it demands the sacrifice of other impulses or promotes the concept of compromise. In other words, to be selfish is wrong when your interests go to die, and this is so-called unilateralism in the dictionary of International Relations. Now might be showing gainsaying to my proposition of the word “selfish”, for it means to see your interests with the exclusion of others, no doubt, it is well-defined. Then, how can I say, it is right in a particularism of few cases? That is very simple, it is not possible to be loyal to others throughout life, philosophically, because anywhere and other we become selfish. That’s why I am stating to be selfish is not wrong if it doesn’t demand the sacrifice of others’ interests. For illustration, two boys are deciding where to study, then if one decides that he wants at his home, now he is deciding without the feedback of other friends, but maybe another friend wants the same location of study. So, this self-centered approach of the first friend is not wrong; however, this situation or case does not work everywhere.

Fourthly, what is meant by being a good person in our society? There are multiple answers to this question, but in my opinion, this concept of defining a good person needs some more supplementations, but how and why? See, we usually declare any person is good or bad by a few parameters- a well: settled in the concept of social status, to be emancipated from any drug addiction, and to be beautiful in the demands of others. By the way, I am stating these qualities of man to be true, pathetically, these criteria of being a good person are different for both sexes: male and female. For instance, females are expected to be angels more than males in terms of their bodies. Well, very few see that to be good also means that that person should have good deciphering of the Islamic school of thought, for when he or she knows Islam then shows a pragmatic approach to it then, ultimately, she or he will be a good person because Islam is the complete code of life. And the most important thing is that the followers of Islam entertain the benedictions and wages of their labors in both worlds- mortal and sublime.

Fifthly, why it is hard to find? There may be multiple answers, but the chief reason, in my subjectivity, is we ourselves do hurry to adopt the ultimate decision about others and like-mindedness is a pivotal area of mind and personality to define others. For instance, if I see any other person with like-mindedness then I would declare that person to be good. Well, what a human mind crisis! We have to see ourselves as true and pious. If this is the true case then why evil is dominant over goodness in society, and why do conflicts arise? Thereby, my point of view regarding being a good person is that being humans, we have to accept the binary nature of human life, where weakness and goodness lie simultaneously. Again the pathetic situation of human nature is that one evil of another person seems more dominant over a hundred of goodness, by the way, we impose this pathetic nature on others, not ourselves. If we inflict this nature on ourselves, then, believe me, in this way self-accountability will promote then is actually a pivotal point to disseminate positivity in society.

Lastly, to define anyone whether he or she is good or not, must see yourself in which criteria you land. Because to bring forth the flaws of others is an easy task than its own. Therefore, firstly set criteria for defining or declaring others good or bad for yourselves, and then impose them on others. Because if you can fit in that criteria of defining and declaring, then others can also come in that one. By the way, I am not gainsaying other a few exogenous elements that spoil our conscience to be bad; for instance, technology in the form of mobile phones, porn websites, and political polarization in our society.

In nutshell, no doubt, to find a good man is hard, but it does not mean you are a good person but need like you. By the way, this is the depression of every third out of five people who believe that he is a good one but need a like-minded person. Thereby, in my subjectivity, I have expatiated this concept meticulously in my subjectivity. We need to accept our mistakes bravely and then work over them to change into our strength, by the way, in human nature to accept your mistakes is very hard but not impossible, and this is one of the reasons why disdain lies in our society more than love and caring. 

Written by  M. Touqeer Niaz 

Human Activist at Punjab University

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